Where Do You Get Off?

(The scene is a crowded bus, regular bus activity.  It’s pretty packed, and the driver stops to let some more people on)

Bus Voice: (read entirely with that flat bus voice) As a courtesy to boarding customers, please move to the rear of the bus.  Please give up your seats to elderly patrons or persons with disabilities. (JESSE boards) Or even for this guy.  This guy has had a really really bad day.  Just look at him. (beat.  He is pawing through his wallet) Uh-oh. (beat) Looks like he doesn’t have his CTA pass.  He just spent $86 on that thing and now it’s gone.  And on top of it all, all he has on him is a 5.  Damn.  He knows the bus driver doesn’t have change but he’s going to embarrass himself by asking anyway cause he doesn’t want to blow another five bucks - after losing 86 - on a bus ride.  A bus ride where he has to stand. (beat) Come on people, show some decency.   He’s soaking wet.  It’s not even raining that hard out there, he must’ve been pushed into a gutter or something.  His CTA card’s probably still floating in there.  Anyone?  You know his day’s not over yet either.  I bet he doesn’t have his keys.  Or he’s gonna get mugged or a car’s gonna hit him and he’ll break his shoulderblade.  You can’t let him just sit down for 10 minutes?  I can’t believe this. (beat) You’d ALL be getting up if he were blind.  And blind people don’t ALWAYS need you to move for them.  Sometimes they just like to stand.  But if a blind person, or even a person with gray hair boarded this bus, let alone somebody in a wheelchair...  Good God, when that ramp comes down, 2/3s of you are in the back quarter of the bus before the hydraulic lift is even engaged.  But you won’t let this guy - this one guy who’s just been shit on since the moment he woke up today, get 10 minutes of rest before he steps back out into that shit-storm of a world that’s obviously out to get him. (beat) Fuck him, right?  Yeah, well enjoy the seat now, it’ll be you tomorrow.

(Some chump gets off)

Thank you for riding the CTA.